"Servants of the People: The Inside Story of New Labour," Andrew Rawnsley

I have been on a politics reading kick lately. It's embarrassing; I promise to make up for it by reading something less horribly dorky, like a romance novel or something about space soldiers commanding armadas of space dragons. Bear with me, I am sure I will recover soon!

Frankly, I should have known better in another way; history makes for better reading after all the participants are dead, because then you can get all the gossip and cod psychoanalysis in without the danger of libel suits popping up. But I keep forgetting this, to my detriment. Stupid contemporary history! You can't have a proper narrative without knowing how things end! (I felt like writing in little epilogues for all the "characters" on the endpages.)

Anyway, according to Rawnsley, Tony Blair became Prime Minister and some things happened (not Iraq, the book was published before that shitstorm came to rain feces upon the land). Everything that happened, good or bad, made everyone involved feel terribly insecure, because they were all terrible fakes. Rinse, repeat, the end.

The one part of the book that really sticks in my head is the account of the 2000 London mayoral election, mainly because Rawnsley keeps making newt-themed puns at the expense of Ken Livingstone, the now ex-mayor. By the end of the book I was half-reading, and half thinking about newts and why they were so important to Red Ken - so important that Rawnsley had to bring them up every damn time the man was mentioned. I came to a conclusion: The newts were obviously Ken's spirit animals, the amphibian equivalent of Dick Whittington's cat. I like to think that Ken would go riding round London at night on a giant newt, visiting all of his ten bajillion children and maybe siring some more along the way. That's why he lost the mayoral election; the giant newt died and without its psychic powers he is nothing. I wonder where it is buried?